Ok, so since arriving in Florida I have been on the job hunt. With children, its hard enough to find suitable daycare and have coordinating schedules with the other two that are in school. There is nothing around the area so commute is the only possibility but at this juncture right now, its difficult because everyone is on a different time schedule. What job will allow me to drop my son off around 8am, then drop the other at a daycare (when I do find one) and then leave to pick up my son from school around 3pm? I have been trying to find a stay at home job and all of my outcomes have been "you have the experience we are looking for but because you haven't been working for more than 2 years because you were away, we can't hire you".....great!

I enrolled in Penn Foster for their online Medical Transcription course only to find out that they are not even accredited with AHDI. So I dis-enrolled. Career Step is a school I want to enroll but its like $300 down payment for the Medical Transcription course only ($500 for the MT w/Editor course). I can't afford that, not with the budget we have. We are a one income family of 5 (3 growing boys who eat us out of house & home & with school and outside school activities that cost an arm and a leg). Which is why the hunt for me to find a job, to help supplement and have the opportunity to save & travel. With one income, we won't have that opportunity and we'll be stuck here for 5 years without going anywhere.

So all the stay-at-home jobs are customer service type jobs (call centers) which I cannot do because I have a 2 year old so I won't have a quiet environment to work in. What I need is a data-entry, computer only, no customer service/sales type of job so that I can do my work, watch my son & earn a paycheck.....but reality is, those types are hard to come by and when I do find them...its all about the experience.

So I have applies to Winn Dixie, Publix, Wal-Mart, CVS, Walgreens even Baptist Health Gulf Breeze....NOTHING.....I am starting to lose hope that I will find anything. My last resort is fast food places and I really don't want to be working there but if I have to, then I have to. Great place for someone who has a Bachelors degree, working minimum wage. But everyone that I have spoken with said the Gulf Coast area has a high unemployment rate and lack of jobs.....great.

So what is a girl suppose to do? A lot of companies are still not accommodating to the working mother. Daycare is not cheap and I don't want to be working just to be paying for daycare, what is the point? I don't need medical benefits, I have Tricare...so I am set for life....I just want to bring in a paycheck, start building up our nest egg again, start putting money away for the kids again, start having extra money so we can do things again (like how it was when we were in Hawaii when I worked, we were fine).....but living paycheck to paycheck because cost of living for a family of 5 is quite expensive and on one paycheck, its not easy.

Credit card companies haven't made it any easier since the economic collapse, instead of lowering interest rates to help out, they raise them and put people on the brink of bankruptcy because they don't give a shit. And that is what's killing us...the FUCKING CREDIT CARD DEBT! We were fine before we left for Italy and now we are back in debt again because of the cost of living in Italy we had to resort to using the damn credit card...and now we're in a hole....again....trying to get out....and its so freaking frustrating......I hate credit cards, they should do away with the damn things, they are evil! I mean we are never late with our payments, always paid on time, we pay more when we can and yet they still raised the damn interest rates on us because they can....pricks! Thanks for treating loyal customers like us like crap. I mean what the fuck man!

So now, I am still jobless, trying to find a job....we are living paycheck to paycheck because the cost of living to survive is eating up everything Ken makes with nothing left over to save and its just frustrating me. I don't sleep well because I worry. We have used up our savings to pay for things and its dwindling down so fast.....

I dunno what to do already...I feel hopeless, useless because I am not bringing anything....

I am back....being away for so long......was I busy, not really....I guess I didn't have much to say....ok I did, but I just didn't think to put them into words....go figure....